Our Time Is Now!

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Calling all mystics, lightworkers, healers, and sages, OUR TIME IS NOW!

We were born with a deeper connection to Mother Earth, a deeper KNOWING. Many of you,  like me, have gone through a series of hardship and tribulation. Feeling like an alien, compared to the masses. Those times were our tests. Training for this day at hand. Opportunities to discover your own unique gifts.

Always knowing there was a deeper purpose for your life. Possessing a deeper awareness of the Life, of the Universe.  A spiritual connection, that most have abandoned in search of materialism and ego status. Living in a false paradigm, you sensed your life was meant for so much more.

Many of you, over the years uncovering and honing in on and perfecting the Magick you possess within, some of you just beginning to discover your gifts.

For me, it was an awakening in nature over 30 years ago, after moving to the hilly countryside outside of Missouri’s capital city, pushing my infant son up and down rocky steep terrain, in his Graco stroller, long before jogger strollers were even a thing.

A very profound connection to Gaia was discovered, one I was aware of raised in central rural Minnesota, but one that lay dormant for several years after I left home for college.

Over 3 decades ago now, my life committed to following that calling, very consciously embarking on “the road less traveled.”

Life bringing many obstacles my way: the suicide of my father, a mysterious illness, ultimately diagnosed as severe mercury poisoning, separation and eventually divorce of my first husband (3 sons later), and my darkest most challenging times, moving to a dark, backwards part of  our country, and being submerged in a world of ignorance, a world I could not comprehend.

Upon finally getting out, remarrying, and giving birth to my daughter at age 41, I was more certain than ever, my life held a much larger, deeper purpose.

By this time, I was well aware I was a healer, a mystic, an empath. I knew I possessed strong powerful gifts as I seen similar ones being displayed in my sons – sons I lovingly and knowingly called my “warriors”. Each of them possessing their own unique gifts, their own Magick.

My youngest son having gone through the most difficult, most challenging times from the age of three. Fighting against conforming to our society’s ways, especially during our “sentence” in the backwards state, the result, over fifteen years of duress.

I had  always told him though, a woman of visions, a gift I strongly and firmly believed in by that point, “We will be rising as everyone else is falling. Together we will rise higher than either of us could ever imagine.”

I sit in Pensacola, FL as I write this, at his wife’s apartment. Now a sailor at the Pensacola Naval Air Station, a select aircrew member. Last year having to jump through major hoops at the age of 23, to even be able to be accepted into the Navy because of his prior history, (I never had a doubt he would make it though!). Once waivered in, being chosen as part of the select 61st Cardinal Division in St. Louis, MO.

He has spent his life writing his own script, following his own inner voice. Never conforming, always honoring his spirit.  Last year, ending in the marriage to his beautiful wife, now awaiting the birth of their first child.

Winter/spring of 2020, NEVER would I have imagined the words of my vision to be SO LITERAL.  “We will be rising when everyone else is falling. …” The whole planet suddenly in the midst of an abrupt battle against a silent killer. Suddenly, the majority of the planet submerged into the unknown of an enormous liminal space.

Mystics, lightworkers, healers, and sages, we all knew – we all felt in our souls – that a time like this was drawing nearer and nearer.

After watching our planet spiral deeper and deeper into the destruction of “Western civilization” and the ruination related to subversive consumerism and egotism, this is the opportunity for the Universe to elevate into a state of higher consciousness. Snap the masses out of their lulled reverie, and bit by bit, begin to take our planet back.

We each know our gifts. We each know our Magick. We know what we were brought to this planet to do. It’s time to put them to use and do it. It’s time to open our hearts even wider. Expand our minds even greater. Elevate our souls even higher. This is not to be a time of fear, but a time for hope.

Great, wonderful, beautiful hope.

As for me, I know I’ve been patiently waiting for my time – and my time is now! I will do all I can on my part to generate permanent loving and planet healing change – FOR THE REVOLUTION BEGINS WITH ME.

Namaste

The Rant I Knew Was Coming!

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I put it out there the other day, that what I wrote was my “mother’s rant”, but true to fashion, as I know myself, what I feel always comes a couple days before the actual event.

Today, is in fact the day my “Rant” has bubbled to the surface. And, it has done so for several different reasons. First, and foremost on my list though, is an extremely sad loss that I learned of yesterday.

I consider myself very blessed to have grown up in the area I did, during the time that I did, around the people that I did. Not that I would say I was really close to them at the time, but I was very aware that collectively we had something very unique, very special, and quite rare.

That being said, when my BFF of 50 plus years, was on her return home texting spree, after a funeral for her husband’s family member a couple states away, and she sent me a screen shot from a closed class Facebook account, regarding a classmate whose 26 year old son had “passed” the day before, I was beyond deeply saddened.

It had been bad enough, the few times last year when posts came across that we had lost members of our class of 144, which graduated in the year of 1983, but to think that one of them had just lost a child, was heartbreaking.

After the screenshot she sent, she sent me a more personal, and acutely disturbing text message from another classmate, as they both had children who were good friend’s with the deceased.

The cause of death was unknown, but the situation in which this young man was found, dying in his sleep, after an unsuccessful attempt at CPR. having a history of depression, anxiety, and alcohol problems broke my heart.

Beginning to write this, on a day that held immensely painful memories for myself, memories I have finally been able to free myself of after 15 long painful years, the news hit me really hard.

The “Elephant in the Room,” that no one wants to talk about, but everyone is finally growing more concerned of, due to its sky-rocketing occurrences, at younger and younger ages, is depression and worse, suicide. (Not at all saying that was what this was.)

Why someone would, or could, do such a thing, such as taking their own life, is something I understand way too well.

Not only losing my father in this manner, but fearing for many years that my youngest son would head down a similar road, and also having grappled with periods of depression myself, it’s a topic I am familiar with on a profound level.

Some time after losing my dad, back in 1994, working as a critical care nurse, and seeing several suicide attempts coming in on a weekly basis, I had heard, or read, that depression was due to an emptiness within the psyche, or the spiritual self. Being a free-spirit, and being conscious of a world most weren’t, these words spoke to me.

Especially back then, the “material” age, leading into the new millennium, with the “millennials,” totally wrapped in ego-living and pure self-gratification, the thought of spirit had all but been extinguished from the American language.

It seems that, not until the last several years, has there really started to be a resurgence of the huge role spirit plays in one’s life. Or, how, with people who suffer from depression, and other mental illness, the complete absence of the role of lack of spirit as a cause exists.

People can, and will scoff, at what I write, but I write from a place of KNOWING. A place of not just watching and observing on a daily basis, but from a place of experiencing on a personal level.

We hear endlessly about chemical imbalances, and the use of pharmaceuticals as the answer. Absolutely, yes, this plays a role, but where is the discussion of the spirit? And, the spiritual emptiness within people’s lives that lead to addictions of every type imaginable? Why mental health problems are truthfully mushrooming off the chart?

I say what I say from a personal perspective. My dad committed suicide because his was lost, broken and empty inside. Possessing a spirit, that I remember from an early age, was alive and full of energy. Full of excitement for life, and the natural aspects of the world, one’s connection to Mother Earth.

He instilled all of this energy, compassion, and love of nature into me as a child. Something I would tap more into and begin to understand in my early years of motherhood.

Depression would raise its ugly head during periods of my life, when the deeper, spiritual side of me, was not being fed. Then, when my youngest son started to profoundly grapple with the dark side of his psyche, I became very aware that I needed to dig deeper within myself to find answers for me, so that I could find answers for him.

It was only in reconnecting with all the things that fed my spirit, that fed my soul; music, movement, and Mother Earth, that healing was allowed, and the sensations of depression would be completely shed.

During that time, as the darkness within our country descended, depression and mental health issues continued to climb, with the number of suicides escalating, happening at younger and younger ages.

Our country becoming entirely spiritually devoid of any positive energy, as people became morosely engrained in the material, ego-based way of living we had been indoctrinated into, being exposed to more and more degenerative ways of living, as if they were the norm, as if we were somehow advancing as a human race by doing so.

It saddens my heart that we have had to come to this place.  But, on the positive side of humanity, it is when things get bad enough for more and more people, that gradually, slowly, the masses begin to wake up.

As the multitude stop looking outside themselves for answers, and finally start doing the hard, but much needed work of looking within, reconnecting with one’s own spirit, that we begin to see change.

We are a long way from turning the “Titanic” around, but we are at the place of a new beginning. A Spiritual Awakening on the horizon, as mankind starts to reclaim all that is natural and humane. For, it is only in owning all that we possess within, the good, the bad, and most especially the ugly, that the shift will occur.

It is only in owning our frailties and imperfections as humans, it is only in not comparing ourselves to one another, but celebrating our uniqueness, it is only in not expecting perfection out of ourselves, and God forbid our children, and it is only in facing our fears head on, that we begin to make the much needed shift in healing ourselves, and then our planet.

A Spiritual Awakening is on the horizon. A claim to take back Self and the beauty that each one of us holds within. A new dawn awaits, as we begin to lift ourselves, and then each other, out of the dark abyss we have allowed our country, our planet, to become lost within.

This I know, and I will do all I can on my part … for the Revolution Begins With Me.

Keeping My Sanity

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Feeling more like a rant on a final winter break day. A release of tensions that I hold within. Thirty-three years of what has amounted to mostly single-parenting of children under the age of 18, with 4 more to go before my youngest graduates.

The six years in between marriages, before starting over with a second husband and a brand new baby at age 41, the most draining and damaging to my psyche. A time when I was to enter an extremely Dark Night of the Soul.

A time I would eventually come to realize I had to live through, to help me understand what it is that allows me to truly preserve my mental sanity and inner being.

To focus now on what works, what helps me nourish myself, and keeps me recharged so I can pick up and move further down the road.

There is absolutely no way I could have done what I have done, first and foremost, without exercise and a healthy organic diet as a way of life.

When my youngest son was two, I started exercising (31 years ago). Never an active or athletic person as a child. Quite the opposite. Food was my comfort back then. It also was my nemesis.

The way I felt in my youth, taught me as a mother exactly how I did not want to feel. So, a move to the country, and my best friend’s wedding on the horizon, the beginning of a new life style originated.

Four years later, after the birth of my second son, helping me to deal with ongoing illness, bodybuilding entered my life. It was during this period that I really had an opportunity to look a bit deeper into my psyche and get to know me as a person.

Sudden immense grief, dealing with my father’s suicide at the age of 30, and getting through my final semester of nursing school in college, bodybuilding sustained me.

It is a life I have known ever since. Exposed to a deeper part of myself, a part foreign to most, especially back in the day. Back before organic eating was a thing. Back before the fitness craze really began to take off. Back before major egos were as deeply instilled in the American way of life, I discovered a sense of me.

A sense of me, that began as a young woman of 26. I would fight tooth and nail to hang on to her … and then to retain … when the dark forces won out and finally completely took me down.

Rebuilding that person, regaining that spirit, I knew I would rise bigger and stronger, for that is how we are created. “What doesn’t kill us, will only make us stronger.” My children my driving force, possessing a strong awareness of their psyches, I knew they needed to make it to solid ground before I finally would.

Big deep sigh of relief last year as my “baby boy” age 23, my biggest challenge, and grandest reward, would let me know he had finally made it. Digging into his deeper sense of self and joining the United States Navy. Not an easy task, as his choices and personal history through high school would continue to haunt him.

With each monumental success he found last year though, I found more and more of myself back. Healing and recovering that person I had so long ago met. Her, but then so much more, for I could never go back to the person I had been. It was more a matter of completely, consciously rebuilding and keeping the pieces and parts that worked.

Exercise, fitness, lifting, yoga, and clean healthy eating the ultimate, but not only key, for me opening my door to new found success.

Now, with the dawn of a new year, I begin with an exhausted, but renewed sense of direction. Trying to keep balance and focus as I look out on a brand new horizon, and wonder how life, my life, no longer sculpted out for me by others, will begin to manifest itself.

I don’t need answers now. I just need to know I am finally back. Back on the right road, and this time I have three strong, confident men (no longer boys) and a beautiful young daughter who will provide me strength along the way. Negative energy left behind.

I will rant on paper, or computer, and I will release my frustration and tension through my workouts, surrounded by the people that build me up.

I have reclaimed my sense of self, never to be lost again. That doesn’t mean that every day I will feel energized and amazing, but it does mean that I have won.

I have taken on the darkness and survived, for that is who I am, a fighter, a healer, a tenacious free-spirit. One that will from here on out keep her eyes focused forward and learn from her mistakes. Sitting and resting when I need to. Picking up the pieces and moving forward when ready.

I know I have made it … for the Revolution Begins With Me.

Pushing ‘Reset’ For the Year

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Never someone who’s liked to make New Year’s resolutions, I prefer to practice certain life style choices, honing in tighter as the seasons change.

The beginning of a new year though, always the most significant time of reevaluation. What worked and what didn’t over the past year? Refocusing on my life’s direction and goals that I have set in all areas of my life.

This year, one of my goals is to dive deeper into the spiritual practice of yoga, following the guidance of one of my most inspiring yogis, Seane Corn. Her new book, Revolution of the Soul: Awakening To Love Through Raw Truth, Radical Healing, and Conscious Action, opening my eyes even wider to the power of what one person’s actions and thoughts can accomplish

It is with the 8 Limbs of Yoga, more specifically the 5 Koshas, that I reevaluate my life’s practices and disciplines.

The Physical or Food Body

From a physical viewpoint, this is our bones, muscles, joints, and  tissues. One aspect of caring for the Physical body means focusing on eating habits.

Taking in only clean, organic, earth friendly foods, I still follow my life long bodybuilding diet, which consists of high protein white meat, fish, and free-range eggs, carbohydrates with a high glycemic index, (sweet potatoes, winter squash, brown rice, ect.), a variety of green leafy vegetables, and dairy, primarily in the form of milk.

And, of course, WATER! The most essential nutrient. Something I am always trying to be more cognizant of, especially this time of year.

Food to me, also means that which my mind and spirit are ingesting. Being diligent of the negative I am exposed to in my life, cognizant of the people, thoughts, and words that I allow into my space.

Being focused on my body keeps me in the present moment, grounded in my experiences, and able to investigate what I am experiencing physically. (A key factor in events that are currently unfolding in my life.)

The Energy Body

The Physical Body covers the Energy Body, it is composed of the subtle life-force energy called prana, also known as Chi in Traditional Chinese Medicine. It is the vitalizing force behind every atom, cell, organ, and body system.

Prana coordinates every physiological activity, from pumping the heart to the elimination of waste. Imbalances or blocks within this energetic body greatly affect the overall functioning of the physical body.

Refocusing on the vigilance of my habits and diet, including getting more fresh air and being out in the sunshine – which is the ultimate source of prana – will help me stay sharp and focused, increasing my energy level, (keeping me sane after 33 years of having children under the age of 18, with 4 more years to go), and stabilize my mood and ability to be open and more receptive.

The Mental Body

One’s third layer of being, ones Mental Body, relates to the Central Nervous System. It corresponds to one’s mind and emotions and is expressed as one’s thoughts, feelings, and sensations.

One’s breathing is highly connected to one’s state of being, why Prana is vital to a person’s overall state of well being.

Something I never really gave thought to as a bodybuilder, though something I focused on every time I lifted. Yoga helped me to understand the importance in what I had been doing and helped me grow more diligent in my practice.

Asana, the yoga movements, and/or my days in the gym, help me move any agitation out of my mind and into my body so I can identify it and release. This, something definitely neglected in my life over the past several months as events had me focused in other areas. Perhaps, one of the most significant places I need to be placing my attention moving into the new year.

The Wisdom Body 

The Wisdom Body is your inner knowing. Through coordinating breath with movement one becomes more present in the moment. This synchronizes the physical, energetic, and mental bodies. Only through time and these practices have I been able to attain a more internal awareness of my Wisdom Body.

Underneath ones endless stream of thoughts, feelings, and sensations lies an inner knowing and higher intelligence.  Your intuition, conscience, and the reflective aspects of  your consciousness are all parts of your wisdom body.

Through decades of lifting, and years of yoga practice, greater awareness and deeper insight into the nature of who I am, and how I relate to the world around me, are being attained.

Another one of my bigger goals this year, to work on keeping my mind quieted to discover an even deeper sense of self, guiding me further down the road of manifesting my visions.

Through meditation and quiet reflection, I hope to engage further my wisdom body, or discerning mind. Through focusing on my breathing in and out from my heart, and reading more spiritual texts- the food that nourishes my soul- this area of my being will ever continue to expand and grow.

The Bliss Body 

This is the subtlest of the energy bodies and is connected to our awareness with our highest Self or Spirit. It is the deepest layer of our being and the core of our existence. Our bliss body is where we experience the unbounded freedom, expanse, and joyousness of our true nature.

The Bliss Body is one I tap into when I work out, when I dance, whilst writing, and any time out in nature. It’s like a coming  home. There is a sense of peace and connectedness during which time ceases to exist and consciousness expands beyond the limits of my body.

This place I may not have put words too, but I know I have found in our Oasis, the little piece of heaven we have carved out for our home. The key for me, and another of this year’s foci, to learn how to tap into and sustain this a bit longer when going out in the outside world.

Moving Forward

I have always said, if I am not growing and learning, I don’t want to be living. Moving past a place of healing, I strongly embrace the passion I hold within for life, and look forward to the adventure this year takes me on, for it will certainly take me deeper into the expanse known as Self. Excitement abounds as I move further along the road less traveled … for Revolution Begins With Me.

 

Reclaiming Spirit!

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This is my year! My focus, not to be on the past, but on forward movement, to reclaim all that is mine. All that is me.

Our country, our planet, is on the verge of ascending from a greatly destructive and traumatic period, not just on a physical level, but more significantly, on a spiritual one, into to a place of inner peace and self love.

Multitudes around the planet, having lived through, and survived, ruination of a “mythical” world they once lived in, are beginning to reclaim their inner beings, their souls.

A “mythical” world, as most of us have been living in a world, prescribed to us by those who believe they are in control. We have given up our inalienable rights as humans, in search of trinkets and ego-boosting existences, that have allowed our planet to head towards its demise.

There is a massive shift in consciousness happening though. People finally beginning to look within for answers, as opposed to looking to those they think are experts on matters of life and theology. Where in sincerity, we are our own true masters.

For me, waking to my own consciousness decades ago, but being surrounded by people whose self-limiting ideals and theologies brought destruction to my own life, I needed to obliterate the ignorance, and be honest with myself about any of my own self-eradicating behaviors.

A Healer by nature, the last 15 years have been focused on removing any negative energy and people that held me down. Focused on healing my then young family, I have watched them turn into strong, confident, self-aware individuals. It is now my turn to put full focus on me and the next leg of my odyssey.

The biggest, and most consequential piece of my transformation, was my unrelenting search to return my spirit to self. Not an easy task, one that took much inward focus and commitment, to look into those painful places where the deepest damage was obtained. With the help of like minded people, those who knew the journey well, for they had traveled it themselves, success was inevitable.

Entwined deeply to my youngest son on an energetic level, one who lived through much trauma in his life as a young child, I always knew we would climb out of the darkness together, one day to soar to the highest realms.

Now 23, watching him jump through multiple and seemingly endless hoops, to be allowed to join the United States Navy, (initially with the thought of becoming a Navy SEAL) great rewards were brought to him over the year. Rewards, in many facets of his young adult life.

Together we forge ahead, out of the pain and darkness of our own trauma, our Dark Nights of the Soul, moving forward with a mission to help those on a like path, looking for the Light they have lost in their own lives. Here, to testify, you can make it. You will make it! Not an easy road, but a road increasing numbers are beginning to travel.

We are living in a historical and Magical time. The war between Good and evil heightened to a crescendo. The time is ripe for those of us Awake and wanting change to step up and ban together to take our world back.

Through a mass conscious Awakening, the Shift is beginning to occur. The downward spiral halting. Momentum to be gained as we integrate on one United front. The Awakening and reclaiming of our souls and our spirits front and center in the Movement.

I take the moment to reflect on my past years growth on so many counts. Show gratitude for all that was given to me. Forgive myself where I need to. Then, embrace and fortify that which has been growing deep within my being, as I move forward into the revolution that is at hand … for the Revolution Begins With Me.

TOPSoccer Comes to Synergy-BE THE CHANGE

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It all began with one little boy’s wish to play soccer, but it wasn’t quite that simple. This little boy has autism, with global development delay, and although high functioning, being on a typical soccer team with other kids his age led to meltdowns with him sitting on the field with his hands over his ears.

His physical therapist, Jennifer Highbarger, from ECSE (Early Childhood Special Education) remembered this bright smiling young 4-year-old, and his mom’s comment, that she wished he had the oppportunity to play soccer like all other 4-year-olds his age. He loved kicking the ball around the backyard with his mom. He loved to run.

Joshua is the little boy, now 5. His love of running and his strong desire to play soccer prompted Jennifer to take some chances. She had already started a dance organization, DanceAbility, a dance organization that serves children and adults with disabilities, run through the Missouri Contemporary Ballet.

She began doing some research and learned of TOPSoccer, a national soccer organization for people of all ages. TOPSoccer was created for children and adults with disabilities who would otherwise not be able to play soccer or be physically active.

She began to reach out in different directions. Jennifer having two children of her own, both played competitive soccer for an organization formerly known as Tamashi Futbol Club, owned and run by Coach Adam Booth.

She approached him with the idea, “Would you be interested in getting involved?” Without a hesitation, his response, “Absolutely!”

Doors began to open…

Over the course of a year, changes occurred, Tamashi merged with Synergy Sports, owned and managed by Coach Rylan Adams and Anne Sievers. This made Jennifer and Joshua’s vision of bringing soccer to people with disabilities a reality, as Synergy had the indoor soccer fields that were necessary. They gladly donated their space and time.

Volunteers were needed to finish bringing this project to life. Jennifer reached out to both Columbia Select soccer players and MIZZOU physical and occupational therapist students. The response was enormous.

A training session was scheduled for October 2nd, with 18 soccer players and another former Tamashi coach, showing up, along with just as many, or more, MIZZOU physical/occupational therapists, excited to be a part.

Wednesday, October 9th, the TOPSoccer program, via Synergy, launched a pilot program, to be open to the general public come January.

Along with Josh, 9 other excited athletes, and parents were enthusiastic to be a part. Adam Booth led the soccer session, getting all participants involved and active.

Coaching was modified. Starting with stretching and warming up. Then, activities were geared towards the players kicking the ball on the field. Eventually the idea, with a fun variation, of kicking the ball in the goal was implemented. Everyone running on the field, involved in Adam’s games, it was obvious the night was a success.

These same techniques will be used the next 3 sessions with the final day ending in a game of soccer.

Meet a few of the Top Soccer Athletes.

 JOSHUA

Joshua is five years old. His loves are the outdoors, running, and kicking the soccer ball with his mom. Joshua was diagnosed with autism and global development delay at age 2. His mother, Melanie, along with his younger brother Gideon, moved to Columbia a year ago from Sullivan, MO so that Joshua could receive opportunities not offered in many areas.

Joshua’s evalution of his 1st TOPSoccer session? “I LOVED IT!” he shared with a big smile and a fierce fist bump of enthusiasm.

ANNA

Anna, is TOPSoccer’s oldest player, age 29. She is a lover of all sports having participated in the Special Olympics for many years. Some of the sports she’s competed in are swimming, track & field, volleyball, bowling, tennis, and power lifting. Now, thanks to the volunteers bringing TOPSoccer to Columbia, she can add soccer to her list.

Speaking with Anna, she said that she loves sports, but “they don’t come naturally.” She is one of 6 children, and has grown up watching them able to play all sports.

Her mother Denise, and father Larry, founder of Coyote Hill, a Christian children’s home for abused and neglected children, believe in finding activities that boost a child’s self-esteem. Denise called it, “Plugged in to feel successful.” Anna, looked like she was “plugged-in” after her first soccer session.

Her comment, “I really liked everything! The coach was really good!”

WILLIAM

William is 5 years old and one of the youngest players at TOPSoccer. Surrounded by volunteers to support and encourage, William perhaps needed the most encouragement.

William was born with Down Syndrome and had to go through several years of therapy just to learn how to even walk. The idea of soccer is new to him.

After an hour of direction though, this bright smiling boy was kicking the ball with his assistants, laughing all the way. His parents, Jessica and Adam, proudly stood nearby, along with brother, Aiden.

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