Undefining Me

Up early and down by the firepit in my Mystical Forest a few mornings ago, enjoying the dance of the seasons Missouri lovingly shares. I found myself pondering, “What is my purpose?” “What are my intentions?”

Shedding any use of labels to define myself, 15 years ago, when I left the inhumanity of what nursing was in Oklahoma. I spent many years in flux.

Being a society, a nation that more than ever has gone to characterizing individuals with labels. Not just words that delineate how people spend the majority of their time, but in the last 10 years, more than ever, mainstream media and Hollywood pushing the agenda of hate-filled labels.

I personally have no use for them. I find them self-limiting. People, over the years trying to define me; my children’s mother (fill in the blank, any one of four), a fitness fanatic, a hippie, (one I laugh at, especially after this year with the pandemic and enormous amounts of people returning to the country, and to the earth, to become more self-sustaining. I guess they all became hippies too.), and the one title I wear with tremendous pride, “just plain weird.”

Raised in a small, mostly Catholic community, the mind set was very narrow, most especially that of my birth mother and her rather large family. It was actually my free-spirited father, who likewise never fit into this community, that I was given the vision to look through a different lens.

Becoming aware when we moved to the hills outside Jefferson City, when my now 33 year old son was 2, and curious beyond all imaginable measures, we are born with a unique spirit. Each of us given a vastly distinct purpose before birth.

Walking the hills near our rural home, pushing my inquisitive toddler in his stroller, the shackles and chains imposed on me by my mother and her family, and the Catholic school and church, were finally released. I realized there was enormous untapped potential that lay within.

I was to spend the next decade exploring that potential as I nurtured not only my oldest high-spirited son, delving into his many gifts and talents, but also the addition of his two younger brothers, beginning to explore theirs as well.

A nurturer and healer at heart, at this point, also one by profession, as I began my career as a critical care nurse. I worked intensive care, running the gamut of health related maladies and life threatening traumas. What I viewed daily kept me keenly aware of living in the moment and that my time with them was temporary.

Being an incredibly intuitive, empathic person, I didn’t parent with a “cookie cutter” mentality, nor did I try to relive my childhood through them. Instead, I gave each of them attention where they needed it, including my now 14 year old daughter. They each had completely different personalities, therefore, completely different life purposes

I would/do tell them, “Be yourself! I can’t tell you who that is, but I will help you as much as I can to discover it.” My most important intention to instill in them being, “Have integrity!”

My many years of nursing had taught me innumerable valuable lessons. One of them being, your status and your wealth will one day mean nothing. If you can stand solid and strong in who you are, you will be able to withstand any storm. Thus far, the people they have become, they’ve proven my concept inherently accurate.

As my long, immensely rewarding decades of parenting children under the age of 18 gracefully eases into its final years, with the assistance of the pandemic allowing me to pull even deeper inward, I remain constant in my dynamic state. Undefinable, but ever moving towards a better version of myself. Searching even more closely for God’s/the Universe’s larger life’s purpose.

My challenge to all … Put down the labels! They are so self-limiting. For yourself, and for others around you. Put worry and fear aside! Open your hearts!

It is certain change is at our door. Help promote that change in an upward trend. It’s through broadening the expanse of our minds, our possibilities, that this country will turn back in a more positive curative direction.

I for one, know I will remain undefinable. I will keep evolving into the best version of me. Now more than ever, I know it’s a necessity … for the Revolution Begins With Me.

The Power of Your Inner Voice

The United States of America is on a rapid downward spiral and I for one am not going to sit back and watch it happen. A healer, a mystic, and a visionary, I accepted my place several decades ago as a one day voice for an impending REVOLUTION.

Research and facts of the reality of what has been happening in my country for the expanse of my 55 years of life were readily discovered when I dare to begin listening to the voice within and start questioning some of the “storylines” mainstream media feeds us.

It was the Spirit of 1776 that allowed our founding fathers to win the Revolutionary War. It was the spirit and will of the people that garnered a win and put an end to slavery during the Civil War. Likewise, with Martin Luther King and countless others during the Civil Right’s movement.

That spirit has gotten lost somewhere in time. Rediscovery of our spirits is imminent!

I spent last winter not only reading and digesting my favorite yogi, Seane Corn’s new book, The Revolution of the Soul, but allowing the process of deep healing to occur.

As Sean thoroughly explains, the pain and trauma from our lifetime is deeply embedded in our muscles and tissues. Through the practice of yoga, the various asanas, those emotions are allowed to be brought to the surface, with introspective work we can allow those scars to heal and be released forever, freeing up a new expanse of energy for our souls to find new life.

I came out of what turned into a highly transformative winter through this process. I had myself aligned with the Universe, the Divine, my God. Feeling more strength, confidence, and courage than ever before in my life, yet knowing it was only the beginning.

When the Corona virus hit and our planet was basically shut down, there was surprise, but no amazement for me. Most importantly, there was no fear. I was perhaps more excited that the ignorance and complacency of the vast majority was finally going to be challenged. People were going to have to stop “partying”, start to open their eyes, and finally begin to question the truth about the country they live in.

These emotion only accelerated when the rioting began with the death of George Floyd on May 25th, 2020. Hitting particularly close to my heart, a Minnesota native, hearing first hand accounts as the Twin Cities was looted and burned. The revolution I knew was impending had been launched. Not the violent revolution, but the revolution of the soul.

Safely tucked away in my country oasis several states away, I submerged myself in the splendor and glory of Mother Earth. Enjoying perhaps the best summer of my life, knowing that my hard inner work had been done. Knowing that although difficult times lay ahead for our country as a whole, the mindfulness I had stayed focused on would keep me and my family from experiencing the pain of what others were just beginning to feel.

The battle ground is heating up as election day nears, the most significant election of my lifetime by far. Perhaps the most significant election since the days of the Civil War. I have done and continue to do my part to prepare for the possibilities of what is to come. Historical times sit on our front porch. It is up to each and every one of us to seriously hone in on that voice within. Time to get right with ourselves, our God, and the world around us.

I said decades ago, battle lines had been drawn and people needed to pick a side. That battle early this year finally made itself obviously known. Right now only beginning to build in intensity. The question remains, what part will you play? I know my answer, I chose to be a bright Light, for the Revolution Begins With Me.